What if I didn't have UC?

This is a question I ponder from time to time. I don't really dwell on it too often. I really don't.

But just for kicks, here are my thoughts:

1. We would have less of this in our house, that's for sure:

Febreeze and butt wipes...enough said.

2. I probably would still be teaching, bringing home endless work after school, on my feet all day every day.  (This is a shout-out to all my teacher friends. People just don't give teachers enough credit. Seriously). 

3. We would be getting out of debt (paying off our car and student loans) more quickly.

4. We would hopefully be having a baby in the near future after #3 took place.

5. We wouldn't be shelling out money for my GI doctors appointments, monthly prescriptions, Remicade infusions, and weekly counseling sessions (little or no anxiety/depression...). This would also help get us to #3 much more quickly, which would in turn also help us achieve #4 faster.

6. We would be able to come and go as we please, not worrying about where the bathroom is located or if I'll have a flare.

7.  I probably wouldn't have my doctors all on my "Favorites" in my iPhone...you think I'm kidding.

8.  And I think I might be just a little more care-free.  


9. And after typing all that I hear a lot of "we would..." like it's all about OUR PLANS and what WE WANT.  I'm sad to say, ultimately we would not really realize that our health is precious, that all our money/possessions belong to God himself, and we would probably deny our incredible need for Him. So sad. We can deny Christ all we want, but He's there.  The choice is ours.

Honestly, I can't imagine this life that I just described.
I am content with knowing that God has, is, and will provide for us--physically, emotionally, financially, spiritually, and beyond.  After all, when has He not?  Scripture tells us to remember God's faithfulness, so that's what I'm doing today--claiming His promise that He is steadfast and His will is perfect.

Yes, I have some BIG questions and wish I could get some answers from God on a few things--not on this side of heaven, I suppose (maybe another post for another day when I'm ready to talk about those things).

Overall though, I'm content, and in the areas where I'm not, I'm working on it...whether that be through prayer, counseling, talking to others that God has brought into my life (including a few with UC), etc.

MK and I have become a team--almost like when you have a group project and NEED the other person's help. Well,  I am the project (lol!!) and i NEED my hubby, and I think he feels the same way....that's one of the things that I find contentment in now. I am less invested in my job at school and more invested in my husband. You just can't put a price tag on that.

Ya know what?  I welcome accept this disease as my reality. Do I enjoy it!?! Heck no, but I know that God has used it to bring me closer to Him; in a world where we are taught to be soooooo stinking independent, He has used this disease to make me utterly dependent on Him, and for that, I am wonderfully, eternally grateful. And I still have so much to learn...