Change, Change, Change

I think I like change.  OK, well most of the time. I'm talking about the kind where something transitions (I also really like the kind in your wallet because I use it to get Sonic Happy Hour drinks, but that's beside point).

Dictionary.com defines "change" as:

•  to transform or convert
• to substitute another for something else
• to transfer from one to another

The Lord has really used my circumstances and experiences to shape my view on change in general. As I reflect on change, I think about all the moves I've made:  
Spirit Lake, Ia -->  Little Rock, AR --> Hampton, Ia -->  Cedar Falls, IA -->  New York City-->Hampton, Ia--> Cedar Falls, IA-->Bentonville, AR --> Bella Vista, AR

I think about the life stages that I've been through that went along with those moves:
growing up --> adolescence  -->high school-->college-->post-college but pre-work (before I got a full-time job) -->working (officially adulthood) haha

Within those life stages, all the roles I've played:
daughter-->sister-->niece-->cousin-->granddaughter-->softball player-->McAlisters employee-->volleyball player-->student-->golfer-->camp counselor-->girlfriend-->Resident assistant at UNI-->fiance-->wedding planner-->bride-->wife--a KLEPPE :)-->aunt-->student teacher-->teacher-->dog-owner and Bailey's caretaker-->receptionist...

Through each life stage, friends change and come and go.  There are those people that stand alongside you that help you through it all--boy, have I been blessed with GREAT friends:

• as a little girl, my best friends were my mom's friends....I hope that doesn't make me strange...I don't think so--Diane, Marge, Carolyn, Alice, and so many more.  
• In Little Rock, I had such wonderful Christian frienships:  Elizabeth, Jacqueline, Laura, Lindsey, Andrea, Steven, Keri, and so many more... 
• In Hampton, I was blessed with people that took me in and made me feel at home my last two years of high school:  Lori, Emily, Amanda, and that whole group of boys...you know who you are!  
• In college, my friendships evolved again: Lori, Hannah, Kelli, Alison, as well as my RA buddies--Katie, Chris, Adam, and Beth
• My camp friends: Tanya, Driver, Brad, and so many more!!!! 
• Met my hubby at camp: MK!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 
• Jan-Kleps (you know who you are!!!) and so many dear Wisconsin friends that there are literally too many to name so I'll just say GO PACKERS and that will be my catch-all for ya'll
• My friends in AR, this time as an "adult" (whatever that means--I don't feel like an adult yet-ha!): Jessi/Jason, Abby/Jeremy, Kate/David, Michael/Sarah, Aubrey, Katie, Ronda, Bonnie, Kathleen, Emily, and MANY MANY more...

(If I left you off, it's not because you are not important...you fall in the "AND MANY MORE" category, I promise.  Remember, I'm medicated and my brain just doesn't work the best some days, and I'm tired as I write this, so I'm sure I'm forgetting some of ya'll!!!! SOOOOOOO SORRY!!)

My point in all of these long lists (thank you for bearing with me and reading this far) is this:  no where in that looooooong list is "chronically ill" person.  I'm choosing not to let that define me.  It's really really hard to not feel like my life has changed for the worst because of my UC.  Sometimes being sick is all I can think about and feels like a full-time job.  It feels like that's WHO I AM..."I'm Kristin with UC."  I feel so different from normal people because I:

• have to worry about prescriptions
• worry where the closest bathroom is...enough said.
• wonder if I should commit to something we're planning in advance because I don't know how I'll be feeling when that event finally rolls around
• go to the doctor all the time
• can't just have a baby when we want to because my body isn't ready to be hospitable to a baby....sometimes my body doesn't even show me hospitality! 
• wonder when my next flare-up will be
• get infusions instead of taking pills
• see a counselor to process all this  
• just quit my job (that I truly loved) because my illness took over
• had to get a new job to still be able to pay the endless medical bills (I hate checking the mail...ugghhh)
• can tend to worry about all this junk that's swirling around me all the time. Ick!

 Instead, I choose to believe God's word:

• I am fearfully and wonderfully made (Psalm 139:14)
• God causes all things to work together for the good of those whjo love God and are called according to his purpose for them (Romans 8:28)
• I don't not need to worry because the Lord will provide for all my needs (Matthew 6:31-33)
• God is able to accomplish way more than we could ever hope or ask for (Ephesians 3:20-21) if we just trust Him that He's got our back!
• 2 Corinthians 1:3-7 is my prayer that through all this mess I might be able to help someone else by sharing my story: 

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, ⁴ who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. ⁵ For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows. ⁶ If we are distressed, it is for your comfort and salvation; if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which produces in you patient endurance of the same sufferings we suffer. ⁷ And our hope for you is firm, because we know that just as you share in our sufferings, so also you share in our comfort.       

• According to this verse we were not intended to live in isolation, so community is so important.  Each of you dear friends in addition to my wonderful family--extended and immediate--has greatly influenced my life (and like I said, I apologize if I left you off).  Thank you for investing in me and my life.  I'm thankful for each and every one of you!  So many of you have prayed me through so many of these changes and life stages....some of you were praying for me before I even knew what prayer was! THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!

• I also don't believe that God wastes any experiences, so everything that I've ever gone through and all those hard, and even painful changes and challenges, God is using to prepare me for exactly where I am today and heading in the future--equipped (Ephesians 6:10-18) for each new experience that comes my way.  (For example--I certainly feel this way about my husband --God could not have picked out a BETTER man to walk down this tough road with me.  He is patient, thoughtful, and understanding, and good-natured beyond his years which is exactly what I need to balance me out).  God is so good!!! 

What changes have you gone through OR are in the process of going through that cause you to go before the Lord and believe what His Word says over your circumstances and emotions???  I'd love to hear from you.
 

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PS-
Day 1 of November: I'm thankful for God revealing himself through his beautiful creation.  Love the fall in Arkansas and all the changing colors!!!